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How to win at poker

Hello, everybody! We’re going to play a game of poker today, and I’m going to use my mental powers of persuasion to make you pick the losing hand. So what I’ve got here are ten cards, which is just enough for two hands of poker. We can give them a shuffle if you want. I’ve got no fancy shuffles, so something like that.

And what I’m going to do is I’m going to deal out two cards at a time. And you’re going to have a free choice to pick your own hand. So let me deal out the first two cards.

There’s one, and there’s two. Now I’m going to ask you to pick a card. I’m going to have to play this part for you, so let’s say you pick this card. OK, so you’ve got the queen, and I’ll take the remaining card. OK, let’s deal out two more cards.

Again, you’ve got a completely free choice. You can pick any card you want to. Any card you want. Let’s say you pick this card. OK, you’ve got a seven.

I’ll take the remaining card. Let’s deal out two more cards again. You can pick any card you want to– the card on the left, the card on the right– whichever card you want. Let’s say you pick this card. OK, that’s another seven for you.

I’ll take the remaining card. OK, to make it easier for you, this time, I’m going to deal out the two cards face up. So there we go–two cards, face up. You can pick any card you want to. Well, let’s say you pick the seven. There you go!

You’ve got three sevens now. Now, to make it really easy for you, I’m going to deal out the remaining cards one at a time. Let’s see.

Do you want that card, or don’t you? Maybe you want to take that card away from me. I do have a king over here. So let’s say you take that card, and I’ll take the remaining card. So there we go.

I’ve dealt out the ten cards. You had free choice to pick your own poker hand, and you ended up with three sevens. Let’s have a look at what I had. I ended up with a full house.

Now, the way to win this game is whoever has the queen has the losing hand, and I forced the queen on you, and I wasn’t particularly subtle when I did it. So I forced the queen on you, and you will lose. You see, if you notice, in these ten cards, we have three aces, three kings, three sevens, and the lonely queen. Now, the best you can do with the queen is to have three of a kind, in which case, I will have a full house. On the other hand, if you had something else, like like two pairs, I’m going to have three of a kind, and I’m going to win again. If you had, say, one pair, I’m going to have two pairs.

and again, I’m going to win. So whoever has the queen has the losing hand. If you find some way to force the queen on your opponent, you’re going to win, and you can give them a completely free choice after that point. And that’s how you do it! So, if you have been, thanks for watching.